Passing the baton of responsibility and authority to the next generation can be scary. After all, they don't seem to make decisions the way we would. Things we consider important don't seem to matter much to them. How can we trust them with all we've worked so hard to accomplish?
Many organizations experience this generational conflict. Older leaders have a hard time understanding, and therefore trusting, younger ones who are anxious to find their role in leadership. The latter often can't understand why older leaders believe and do what they do, and their questioning may lead to conflict.
Most of this tension results from generational differences that exist because of contrasting values. We make choices and decisions based on our value system, and differing values often lead to misunderstandings and misinterpretation. This, in turn, hampers our relationships and lessens the effectiveness of our work together.
As Christians, reading the same Bible and worshipping the same Lord, how can our values be so different? We can understand differences with non-Christians, but how does it happen with fellow believers?
How Values Develop
According to Morris Masses, who first aroused our interest in this topic, there are three stages of value development. In the first (from birth to about 7 years old), imprinting takes place as a child absorbs all he or she is experiencing without evaluation, considering it normal.
In the second stage (ages 7-13), modeling takes place as the child looks at the world around him, choosing heroes, and deciding what values to embrace. In this stage, at about age 10, the most crucial value-development takes place, with the most lasting impact.
The third stage (ages 14-20) is a time of questioning, challenging, and experimenting with new or different values, deciding which are valid and worth keeping, and which will be traded for others.
Understanding this process helps us realize why people of different generations have contrasting values. For example, children coming of age in the 1930s experienced a world unlike those in the 1950s or 1990s. These different worlds produced generations who see life differently, and have a hard time understanding each other. Looking at the four generations living today demonstrates how events influenced values.
Generations Alive Today
The Builder Generation, born before 1946, experienced the Great Depression and World War II, leading them to value financial security, teamwork, sacrifice, delayed gratification, and the government which got them through these ordeals. Their values more closely resembled biblical values; extended families were close, and marriages lasted a lifetime.
The Baby Boomers, born from 1946-1964, arrived to postwar affluence and the indulgence of parents who wanted them to have a better life than theirs. Boomers got used to getting their own way. They were more aware of political and social issues and became more and more disillusioned with government, big business, traditional religion, and parents. Other issues affecting their values were increasing divorce, working mothers, and the sexual revolution. This group values self-fulfillment, individualism, and material wealth.
The X Generation , born form 1965-1976, grew up in a difficult time financially and socially. The struggling economy, plus the increase in single-parent households, created many "latch-key kids" who came home from school and waited for working parents to arrive. While the parents were striving for self-fulfillment and monetary success, these kids were feeling abandoned, longing for meaningful relationships. They became skeptical of big organizations, through things like Watergate and environmental pollution. AIDS, threatened shortages of natural resources, and a lack of good jobs influenced their worldview as they began entering the workforce.
As adults, Xers value relationships over organizations and their loyalty must be earned through authenticity and trust. They enjoy diversity in their relationships and are more tolerant than previous generations. They want to know why things are as they are, and want their ideas considered. They bring to the marketplace a wealth of technological skills and creative energy.
The Net Generation, born from 1977 to 1997, is just entering the workforce, and won't be moving into leadership for a while, but may become leaders faster than we think. Growing up with the Internet, they have incredible skills in accessing and applying information, giving them a sense of competence and optimism about their future. We need them because they can help us accomplish things much faster. Although they're growing up in fearful times—AIDS, stranger danger, broken and blended families, increased violence—their parents are more protective and intentional about parenting. These kids are growing up with more positive relationships with their parents.
There is Hope!
In our book, Boomers, X-ers and Other Strangers (Tyndale House) we show how individual factors, greatly impacting each generation, cause clashes with other generations. But there's hope! Generational clashes due to value differences can be minimized through understanding, acceptance, and forgiveness.
Understanding other points of view and allowing for differences helps people communicate and get along. If a Boomer leader understands that his X-er coworker values relationships more highly than organizational goals, he'll understand why the X-er doesn't want to put in long hours or work overtime to accomplish those goals. It's not because he's lazy or doesn't care, which might be the Boomer's natural assumption. It's because he puts family relationships first and doesn't want to compromise.
Acceptance is crucial to every relationship, and a basic need for healthy self-esteem. Acceptance of someone doesn't mean we have to approve of what he believes or does. We can accept someone as having worth, even if we can't always agree. Sometimes acceptance involves trust and even some risk.
Forgiveness provides great freedom, both for the forgiver and the forgiven. Many times, value differences lead to conflicts that damage relationships. To keep communication open, and relationships healthy, we need to be able to forgive. As we work toward resolving differences that divide us, it may be the most important of these three key elements, but comes more easily when it follows the other two.
So how do we all work together? The workplace will be more harmonious when we strive to understand each other's frame of reference and values. When we recognize that many issues are matters of preference, not morals, we'll avoid critical attitudes. By being open to trying new things, or doing them differently, we may discover more effective ways of ministry. We need to accept each other as valuable creations of God, and learn to agree to disagree on noncrucial issues. Each generation has strengths to offer, so let's build on them and be quick to forgive the weaknesses.
Rick and Kathy Hicks are coauthors of Boomers, X-ers and Other Strangers: Understanding the Generational Differences the Divide Us [a Focus On the Family book, Tyndale House]. Rick is president of Operation Mobilization USA . Kathy serves in OM's enlistment department. You can contact them at Operation Mobilization USA, P.O. Box 444, Tyrone, GA 30290-0444, ph 770-631-0432, or email info@usa.om.org .
This article is reprinted with permission from the Christian Management Report, a publication of the Christian Management Association. The mission of the Christian Management Report is to equip member organizations with management information, leadership training, and strategic networking relationships so ministries are led and managed in God-honoring ways. More information is available at the Christian Management Association.
This article is reprinted with permission from the Christian Management Report, a publication of the Christian Management Association. For more information about the report or the CMA, please contact:
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